A woman is out shopping when she gets a call to say there’s been a terrible accident and her husband’s been taken to hospital badly injured. Making her way to the car she notices a sign over the entrance to the new mall: Today only - All stores, all items, just €5. I’ll just have a quick peek, she thinks. Five minutes won’t make a difference.
In the first shop she sees the most wonderful pair of Manolo Blahniks. And only €5. Too good an opportunity to miss.
Just down the way she picks up a party dress by Rebecca Taylor. Kittenish and feminine. Irresistible at €5.
A pair of jeans, numerous tops, belts, more shoes, and two hours later sipping a coffee admiring her purchases she remembers the phone call. She races to the hospital and is met at the door by a stern looking doctor - a woman of her own age but with the air of authority of one much older.
Well, well, well. I hope you are ashamed of yourself. You swanning around the shops and your poor husband fighting for his life on the operating table. Now, missy, let me tell you, you’re shopping days are over. Your husband was so badly injured that he will need round the clock care for the rest of his life. He will have to be fed and washed and changed like a baby. And you will be the one doing it. There won’t be time for shopping. Shame on you. Shame on you.
The woman breaks down crying uncontrollably with guilt and remorse. With thoughts of how her husband has suffered. Of how she will cope.
Ha, says the doctor. I’m only messing. He’s dead. Show me what you bought.
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brilliant…
Is this a true story?
So where is this mall?
lol, better than apples & nuts!
5 squids for manolos? Fucking right he can wait.
Rosie - Agreed!
Conorín - Of course it’s true. Would I spin a yarn?
Caro - Through the gates of female heaven, take the first right and it’s there on the left. Just beside the George Clooney Free Chocolate Emporium.
Grannymar - Much better.
FMC - I’d have bought the lot and off-loaded them on eBay.
It’s like the one where the doctor visits his patient after the operation. Says, I have good news and bad news, which one would you like to hear? A little hesitant, the patient replies, well, let’s hear the bad news then. We have amputated the wrong leg. Oh! What’s the good news then? The patient next bed wants to buy your slippers… Don’t know why, maybe it’s hospital, patient related, your one reminded me of this oldie.
So, really, are there any such places in Ireland where mad sales happen?
Fantastic! Thanks for the laugh.
Hee!
What a bitchy doctor.
Tee hee.
Gayé - Ha! Nice one. These sales happen? Eh, yeah, see reply to Caro above.
Ann - You thought that was funny? Wait ’till I tell you the one about …
Sam - So, it’s doing the rounds in The Village Jester tonight is it?
Medbh - That’s women for ya.
I miss you, Sneezy!
I’m still here, Sam, just not saying anything. See! You can’t miss me if I won’t go away, can ya?
Flippin’ can if I want!