A Ray of Dope
By Primal Sneeze ~ February 3rd, 2008. Filed under: Gaeilge, Irish identity, Media, Pet Hates, Plonkers, Radio.
»» In the list of top 20 programmes favoured by 20 to 44-year-olds, audiences are increasingly turning to Today FM. Half of the top 20 shows are Today FM shows – the Ray D’Arcy Show is number two with this younger audience after Gerry Ryan, who takes the top slot, with 248,000 and 327,000 listeners respectively. [Source: BCI-JNLR survey - November, 2007]
»» Ryan and D’Arcy are two of the biggest gobshites ever to blow spit into a microphone – There are 575,000 gobshites listening to spittle in Ireland in the 20 to 44-year-old age group. [Source: Primal Sneeze - February, 2008]
Ryan, I could never take seriously since the lamb episode. Of all the voices on the national airwaves, only Joe Duffy’s grates more on my ears, and his Oprahesque treatment of topics is the only reason I can see for his show running 3 hours instead of one. One minute. The man uses more unnecessary adjectives than you’d read in a schoolgirl’s essay.
D’Arcy. His show’s a bit like Viz – Not as good as it used to be. At least Viz coined the slogan and they pride themselves in it.
I admit to being a mad fan years back when Martin Maguire was the producer. I’m no longer a fan. Just mad. And everyone involved with the show seems to be a producer these days. Maybe it’s a case of too many cooks or maybe Martin was a strong leader and made D’Arcy toe the line. I don’t know. All I know is that I seldom turn on the radio in the mornings.
I did tune in briefly on Friday while in the car. D’Arcy was disgusted that anyone would use a towel a second time. That didn’t surprise me – he’s a girl when it comes to hygiene. Actually he is a girl, so I just giggled like a girl back at the radio. I make myself laugh sometimes.
The next earth shattering topic was the Irish for gloves. A listener, a tradesman, was working outdoors in a Gaeltacht village and needed to buy some urgently. Someone suggested lámhainní via text. Someone else suggested miotóga. Neither D’Arcy, who worked briefly with Radió na Gaeltachta, nor co-presenter Jenny Kelly, who was winner of TG4’s Ní Gaelgóir Mé, could pronounce them. Well they actually could, but feigned inability. D’Arcy has become more Gaelophobic over the years. Maybe he thinks it’s hip and cool, and is what his listeners want. But my blood boiled when they positively bubbled with mutual appreciation of their failing. Christ on a bike, it’s not that difficult! Law-v-knee. Mi(t)-toe-ga. There. Now you have them in pronounceable body parts.
For me, the camel’s back was well and truly bollixed long before Friday. His increasingly I’m-open-minded, as-long-as-you-believe-what-I-do attitude led to the dromedary’s demise. Christ on another bike, get a blog if you want to be like that, man!
I cried as the poor camel breathed its last in August when he interviewed fellow blogger, Niall O’Keeffe, about Shitedrivers.com. A radio presenter himself, and well used to speaking, Niall couldn’t get a word in. D’Arcy was convinced Shitedrivers.com would glorify joyriders and boyracers and that was it. Adolescents would upload videos of themselves doing doughnuts and such. Niall tried to explain the registration and moderation processes. No! D’Arcy knew all about the Internet (like John Waters does) and there would be an endless stream of kids lining up to do crazy antics for the camera. And how will the site help reduce road deaths? Niall tried explain that wasn’t its aim. No, no, no. D’Arcy knew it wouldn’t do any good – there’d just be videos of car stunts. How Niall didn’t rip the big bobble head off the midget I don’t know.
Niall wasn’t the first, nor was he the last, to be subjected to D’Arcy’s pontifications. If he wants to play pope and issue Papal Bulls, then fine, let him. Waters does it all the time. But the funny thing is D’Arcy genuinely believes he is a fair interviewer. He tells the listeners he is often enough. I think I gave so-and-so his chance. I just asked him the questions you, the listeners, wanted answered. How many times have I heard this? Why the bull to accompany the Bull? If he needs explain himself, then surely something is wrong.
As for the 327,000 gobshites listening to the other eejit, well, they’re a lost cause altogether – lambs to Gerry Ryan’s slaughter so to speak. More worrying, is that 248,000 247,999 of 20 to 44-year-olds in Ireland don’t seem to see anything wrong with Pope D’Arcy the First either.
Wow… thanks for the mention.
Y’know, I’d have loved to have taken D’Arcy down a peg or two but my interview with him was one of the first I did about shitedrivers.com and to be honest I wasn’t sure what to expect (he kinda caught me on the hop). Besides, they seemed to have some sort of auto-mute set on their telco box (or whatever they use for phone calls) – i.e.: when D’Arcy spoke (and that was a lot), it muted me.
It was (almost) the same with Matt Cooper – I guess I must have been on Line 2 and his ‘main’ guest, the chap from the National Taxi Drivers Union was on Line 1 and Line 1 had priority – because, as I discovered when I listened back to it, whenever the taxi guy spoke, I was muted – no matter how much I tried to be heard, I couldn’t get a word in.
I think Ray was just trying to get an angle. He knew he was the second to do an interview about this site (after Marty Whelan, who was a proper gent) and he wanted to stir it up a bit, just to be different, but I think it backfired on him and he was shown up as not really knowing what he was talking about – unfortunately. Ah well!
[...] Primal Sneeze isn’t a Ray D’Arcy fan, (they never really liked him on the boards either) … and he seems to think that [...]
Niall – Where are ya going with the Wow bit? Anyway, I honestly don’t think he tried to get an angle at all – he just looked at post #1; made his mind up from that; and wouldn’t be swayed. All his research seems to be done like that these days. Will Hanafin (one of the many producers on the show) does his best, but he too, gets shouted down by Pope Ray the Oneth.
Not there at all Primal, I kinda like him and the silliness and the laughing at nothing. Suppose it depends on your expectations. This time slot has been commandeered by official Ireland for a long time, so fair nuff now for a more democratic and irreverent view on stuff. I suppose it’s a matter of taste, and can you still have Rachel and what’s her face lying in the long grass, waiting to pounce. I heard that Niall O’K interview as well, but I understood from the discussion that his site has nothing at all to do with boy racers.
Long shot… but I don’t suppose anyone has a recording of that interview?
Sniffles – The Ray D’Arcy Show suited my taste perfectly until a couple of years ago. I thought I’d made that clear. Then it began to slip. Democratic and irreverent are words I no longer associate with it.
Of course you understood Niall’s site had nothing to do with boyracers. No listener was left in doubt about that. The only one not to understand was D’Arcy.
I think you’re just jealous, Primal. If you look at Gerry Ryan’s Wikipedia page you can clearly see that the man won a Jacob’s award 18 years ago and was given an honorary degree by the Open University. What can you boast but a whole clutch of blog award nominations (and I see nothing about biscuits on their site)? There were no blogs involved in the 1916 rising you know.
As for D’Arsey, carry on. I couldn’t find anything to redeem him.
A few years back the company I was working for sent me back to Dublin to work for a week. Very close mate o’ mine who is big in PR in was walking down Kildare street, when I bumped into him on my lunch break. He was with Gerry Ryan,(a well fattened Lambo I might add), they were working together on something or another. Anyhow, me Mate introduced us, “Gerry this is John, John this is Gerry, John is a mate from college, lives in the States now, working for a week in Dublin”. I couldn’t resist it, “So Gerry what is it you do?” If looks coulda killed, I’d be 8 years dead!
Radio was one of my first loves, but whenever I do manage to find somewhere to live back here in Ireland I’m not encouraged by you to return to the radio that I abandoned when living in the US.
Caro – Blogs aren’t what my grandfather hid under the bed in 1916 for. Or maybe it was – he never told me.
John – Now that is mastercard-priceless! What would I give to have been there!
Eolaí – It’s not all bad. If the nationwides fail you, there’s always local radio. Some can be extremely (though often unintentionally) amusing.
Way back before my last bout of emigration I used to be a regular listener of CKR. Christy saying “Morning All” was one of my favourite things to hear.
I’ll turn that dial so, especially when presenters tell me not to touch it.
Can you pronounce ‘lorry’ Sneezy? Then you’re twice the man that fat lipped twaddler Gerry Ryan is.
I listen to Newstalk, usually in a fit of temper in the mornings so I have no excuse. But I’d rather shoot myself straight through the liver than listen to Joe ‘Man of the people’ Duffy
Eolaí – Ah yes, Christy- I remember him well. He got a bit cocky and they had to fire him. He died not long after.
CKR is no longer, but now we have KFM. LMFM are okay for music in the late afternoon and early evening – never listened in the morning. Red FM in Cork can be a scream. You’ll find one wherever you end up.
FMC – “L-U-rr-y” with a big dirty U. Just like in “h-U-rse”. Proof positive I’m a Kildare man.
Don’t get me started on Duffy. I wasn’t messing when I said his accent hurts my ears and the shite he comes out with hurts all other organs, in particular the brain.
Irish radio makes me want to burst my eardrums with flaming pencils.
There’s an award waiting for you at my place.
Think it’s an age think, I have started listening to George Hook and enjoying the show.
Ann – I’m sorry to hear that, and delighted to hear that … respectively.
Flirty – If we’re
ageingmaturing, then why’s D’Arcy turning into a two year old?I don’t know nuffink about it but that hasn’t stopped me commenting has it? I guess I just like the sound of my own keyboard.
Sam – That’s okay. You commented and that’s the main thing.
I used to like D’Arcy until he became all preachy – who would want to listen to a radio show to be lectured?
Conorín – I recall you saying you were a big fan. Well done for becoming un-fanned!
Thank god its not just me, I hate the crap that comes out of his mouth. He seems to spew out his horrible opinions and the fools of the ireland seem to like it. He is so opinionated and negative it is strange how he could be allowed on our radio during one of the most listened to slots. Im not joking but when I lsten to him he depresses me… not first thing Ray please!!! And dont get me started on his cronies…. sorry guys but nobody wants to hear your bull talk either.
I too have stopped listening to the radio in the morning, good old fashioned CDs seem to put me in better humor than listening to that tripe. Hopefully pple catch on soon and a big GET RAY DARCY OUT CAMPAIGN WILL FOLLOW….
Yours
Gillian
@Gills – Ah jayzez, Gillian! Now I have D’Arcy’s voice in my head: “Right. Right. Right. Now folks, the Ray D’Arcy Show is running the Get Rid of Ray D’Arcy Campaign. That’s right. Right. Right. Right. That’s right, Jenny, isn’t it?”
@Primal Sneeze – He he he – I like it, could be like Anchorman when his auto prompter is tampered with…. I’m Ray Darcy?